Hazardous Workplace

In my attempt to start a new day with a clean slate (ignoring the fact that I enjoyed honey graham SW airlines cookies, pistachios and ice cream with chocolate sauce last night), I wanted to eat a healthy breakfast, but I'm stuck with a frozen breakfast I bought 2 weeks ago until I can get to the grocery store.  I just walked into the kitchen to heat my microwaveable breakfast (Aunt Jemima Sausage & Egg Scramble) - bad news at:

300 calories
18 g fat
890 mg sodium
19 net carbs

Calories, sodium & carbs, OH MY!  However, I'm picking through all the stupid potatoes and leaving them (because, lucky for me, I don't like potatoes unless they're french fried or mashed or scalloped or twice baked), so my total caloric, fat, sodium and carb intake will be lower.  I don't know about that sodium, though.  It might still be 800 mg.  My tongue is burning.

But, I digress (I'm so good at that).  I walked into the kitchen and there are packages and packages of donuts on the counter staring at me.  Beckoning me, whispering, "Eat me!  Eat me!"  Mrs. Freshley's donettes (packages of 6) that someone brought in and dumped on the counter.  Okay, I'd like to say I won't eat it unless it's Hostess, but that would be a lie.  I didn't grow up with Mrs. Freshley's or Little Debbie, but in a pinch they'll do.  Because they've been sitting there for over a week now and it doesn't look like anyone's touching them, and because I'm trying to eat more healthy* am I allowed to throw them all out?

Then I look around and there's a bowl full of Christmas chocolates that I brought in for the guys I work with.  Rrrrrrrright!  You'd think I could just stay out of the kitchen and I'd be safe, but no!  In my office:  on my desk sits the giant container of Girl Scout Salsa Mix (rice & sesame crackers, nuts, corn nuts, etc.), in my desk are mints, in my filing cabinet are several bags of potato chips, cookies & candy, and under my desk is the case of Pork Flavored Cup O' Noodles.  WHAT AM I DOING TO MYSELF?!  I must get rid of it all!  Well, maybe not the Salsa Mix.  I paid top dollar for that.

Water, water, I must drink my water.  I love water.  Water is my new BFF.

*Oh yes, I forgot.  I HATE the word "healthful."  Who makes up these stupid new words in order to make them sound less diet-y?  Pisses me off, actually.  It's healthy.  What's wrong with the word "healthy?"  Why do we have to change our words all the time?!  (That's interesting, though, because one of my favorite books, which I am reading again, is about how English is constantly evolving.   And completely contradictory to what I just said, I LOVE the word "ginormous.")

My biggest goal for the rest of the day is to get on the treadmill.  Oh, I need to eat a sensible lunch & dinner, but my hurdle is that stupid treadmill.  I bought is last March and I've used it less than 5 times.  It's got a TV & DVD player right in front of it, so I can put my Johnny in there and go to town.  I just need to DO IT.  (I'd steal Nike's line, but I think they're still sponsering Tiger Woods and I don't love him right now.)

Onward & upward!